Love Thursday

We had this fantastic little family reunion this past Sunday. While my Aunt and Uncle are down to enjoy the weather for a while, their two daughters and two granddaughters came from Colorado for a visit. We all decided to meet at my parent's house. It was lovely.

The kids had a grand time playing with their little cousin Cassidy, and baby Rylee absolutely melted my heart.

Seriously. It melted! I mean, look at this child!

Isn't your heart a gooey mess floating around inside?

After the gathering, we decided to explore Nonni and Granddad's new sailboat. Yep, a real sailboat.

The kids had a fantastic time yelling sailor-y terms such as, "Aye, aye, Captain!" and "Land, ho!"

They were a right scallywag bunch. Or... something.

It was, all in all, a perfect day.

So, for this Love Thursday, I am reminded of the importance of family. The joys, the sorrows, the frustrations, the satisfactions, but most importantly, the love. Family has the ability to keep us whole. Keep us centered. Keep us just insane enough to live sanely in this world. Think about it... Where would we be without our family?

You take the good, you take the bad...

Well, we learned a little bit about the facts of life today.
It's amazing how even the most beautiful and fun day manages to have a little bad push its way in. The Splendid Charlie had his first soccer practice today. He was so excited! I was too- I'm so happy he is on this team. His soccer coach is the most patient understanding man- and so good with the kids. We've been blessed to become friends with his family. His kids are the same age as Emma and Charlie and they get along so well! It's almost unbelievable. And his wife is this amazing woman. Great people. They do exist!!
So, back to our day... after soccer practice we went to lunch at this great little lunch spot, Chef Voila, with coach, his wife, and their kids.
After lunch, we rushed off to meet some friends at The Rep to see "Go, Dog! Go!" It was a colorful and lively little show. After the show, the kids were able to meet the "dogs" (that would be actors dressed up as dogs...) and I asked Kevin to run out and get the camera from the van. After all, our day would not be complete without pictures of the kids with actor dogs, right? Well, he was taking forever. I was watching out the window and I saw him coming in without the camera. Without the camera! He couldn't find the camera. HE COULDN'T FIND THE CAMERA?? So, of course, I ran out there to find the camera! I COULDN'T FIND THE CAMERA. Our wonderful Nikon D70s, also known as my third child, was gone. Gone. As in stolen. We had it at the practice. We left it in the locked car at lunch. While walking in to the Rep, Kevin asked if he locked the door. He started to make his way back to the car, but for some reason didn't. (I mean, I guess it could be the way I said, "We're LATE." Or something. ) And now it's gone. Gone. Someone violated our space. Felt the need to enter our car. To take our belongings.
Gone.

All the way home we were blaming ourselves.
Kevin: I should have trusted my instincts.
Me: I should have hidden the camera.
Kevin: I should have locked the doors.
Me: I should have let you trust your instincts.

Once home, Emma and Kevin got all fancied up and made their way to a Father/Daughter Valentine's Dance. They looked so wonderful. I wish I could show you pictures. Nice Nikon D70s worthy pictures. Yeah... that won't be happening. I will, however, be able to show you pictures from our old half broken antiquated camera which Emma has inherited. Once we remember how to use it.

So there you have it. A wonderful day with a little bit of yucky in the middle. I'm trying to keep my head straight about it. We can't keep blaming ourselves. We can't change what happened. It's already done. I think we have to pray for this person that felt there was no other way. This person that felt it was okay to invade someone else's space and take something that still has small bits of memories embedded. Images of our life. Daddy just coming home and embracing his little loves. Charlie running after the soccer ball with all the speed he can muster. Our life. It wasn't just a camera. But at the same time, it was only a camera.

So tonight, I will light a candle and say a prayer.
I will pray that this person finds goodness in their life.
I will pray that goodness will one day be enough.
I know there is goodness out there.

It should be enough.

Love Thursday

This wonderful woman I have never met has inspired me. She doesn't even know she has inspired me. Encouraged me. Moved me. She is able to see such beauty, and capture it through a lens to share with the rest of us. I feel so privileged to be allowed access to so many intimate moments. Her name is Karen and she has a great photo blog she calls chookooloonks. She is involved in this great idea called Love Thursday. I think this is brilliant. Mostly because, as stated here, "you can never have too many reminders of love."

So, here is my submission. Seriously? What says love more than rectangular sunglasses given to you after an eye exam by Dr. Love?

Love is all around

Have you ever had one of those days where you just really feel loved?

I woke up to two bright eyed happy children singing, "Good Morning! Happy Valentine's Day, Momma!" and a beautiful handmade card from the Magnificent Emma. We went downstairs and made heart shaped pancakes with strawberries while the children opened their new mailboxes (that Daddy made) and explored the goodies inside.

We then have a fun "love themed" morning of school.

Lunch was baby jelly butter sandwiches (that's PB&J to all you "normal" folks) cut into hearts, as well as carrots and banana followed by 1/2 a cupcake hand delivered by our awesome neighbor (just to clarify, she didn't hand deliver only 1/2 a cupcake- she actually gave us 2!). Those cupcakes tasted like love.

I received a couple of presents in the mail from my not present male. (did you catch that play on words? Sometimes I even surprise myself with my corniness cleverness...) The Amazing Kevin is still too far away from us and I'm willing him home with every ounce of my being.

The kids and I played and had so much fun today. To add to the Mary Poppins feel of the day, we actually tried to fly a kite. I really did feel like I was soaring.

Our day ended with an invitation by our fantastic neighbors to join them for a pizza dinner. You know you are loved when your neighbor invites you to intrude on their Valentine Dinner.
It was truly a lovely time.

So, whether you celebrate or not, Happy Valentine's Day.

Sometimes... there is love when you are least expecting it.
Sometimes... love is all you need.
Sometimes... love really is all around.

Therapy- with a side of Irony.

So, someone really important to me has been going through quite a bit this past year. I won't go into too many details until this person gives me their blessing to "out them." But I talk to her often and find myself entrenched in the Therapist Role. Giving out some pretty good advice, if I do say so myself. Granted, I'm not sure if she is just smiling and nodding on the other end of the phone willing me to shut-up, but when I reflect back on my counsel all I can think is, "Why the hell am I not doing this stuff?"

Lately I've been finding myself in need of counsel. I'm not sure who to go to, though. Family will always side with you and give you the old "You're doing the best you can." Or "Chin up! It's not that bad." or "Shut up ya big sissy. You're being a moron." Friends can be good listeners, but I'm not sure if they would feel comfortable delving that deep into my life. I might scare them away. I know we all have our personal demons, but why can't they be sweet little demons instead of these monsters that make us crazy?

So they say to get rid of these demons, you should face them, right? What better way to face them than to put them on my blog for all the world five people to see, right? Right?
Here are a few of my confessions. At least the ones I'm ready to face for now.

1. I have been eating chocolate. A. Lot. Of. Chocolate. Not only that, I've been eating chips. A. Lot. Of. Chips. Instead of going to the fridge to grab a carrot when I need something crunchy, I grab a bag of chips. And eat them. ALL of them. (Okay, I might leave 5 in the bag so I don't feel like a complete loser. See, I only ate most of the chips, so I'm only most of a loser.) What's wrong with that? Well, when I'm constantly spouting the benefits of eating a healthful diet and staying away from things like, say, chocolate and chips, I tend to feel like a bit of a fraud.

2. I suck at keeping house. I'm not sure if you heard that. I SUCK at keeping house. Not only am I disorganized, but I'm worse than the kids about putting my stuff away. Yeah, I'll yell at them for not putting their scissors away, but I'll leave every single thing I've taken out right in the middle of the floor. For days. I get so frustrate about how completely out of control this house is. I'll complain to anyone within earshot about how impossible it is to keep up with my house, what with homeschooling and a husband working from home. And yet, who's to blame? You guessed it. Not my type A anal retentive husband (as much as I'd like to blame him). Yep. Me. Little ol' me. Well, not so little since I've been eating all the chocolate and chips in the northern heminsphere.

3. I am sleep deprived and cranky. It's not because my little sweet baby is waking me to eat or for a diaper change. My kids are 3 and 5. They usually sleep through the night. It's because I choose to go to bed at 2 in the morning. It might be 1 on a good night. And it's not because I'm exercising to get rid of the chocolate/chips pooch. Or to straighten up the house. It's because of my next demon.

4. The television. Oh, the television. I love me some television. And I have every excuse as to WHY I NEED TO WATCH TELEVISION. (Imagine the next few sentences in a whiny annoying voice) "I'm tiiiiirrreeed." "I've been with the kids allll daaaaayyy." "I neeeeeed a brrreeeeaaaakkk!" Oh, and I love the shows. I mean seriously? Who can get through life without knowing who Marin, Meredith, Rory, Betty, Veronica, or Paula will be sleeping with/breaking up with/getting back together with next? Oh? You don't know who any of those people are? You poor poor thing. Come on over an hang out with me. We'll push the papers aside, find a seat somewhere, open a bag of Natural Doritoes (yes, people they are Natural- does it get any better than that?) and melt our brains while watching a whole lotta TV.

I'll stop there. I'm not sure if you can handle much more than that. So, where's my therapist? Who is going to counsel me? How do I find my way to a better/happier/healthier/less brain-dead me?

I guess my first step would be to try actually listening to me once in a while. I'm finding more and more that I have faults. More than I'd like to admit to. But really, who is fault-free in life? I think the lesson I'm learning is it's important to take the time to really look at yourself, embrace your faults (they are a part of you, after all), and strive continuously to find ways to turn those faults around.

I found this several years ago, and I've had it up on my wall in my office for months. I'm not sure who wrote it, but I think it's time I take a closer look at it and take it to heart.

10 Ways To Be a Better Person
Becoming Who You Want To Be

1. Exercise patience in everything you do and understand that change will take time, devotion, and hard work. Accomplishing one simple goal right now will make it easier to accomplish larger more difficult ones later on.

2. Judging others is easy while judging oneself can be extremely difficult. Look at yourself honestly and ask: What would I like to change about myself? What are my strengths and weaknesses? What do I have to give?

3. There is no growth in resentment. Emotions are often directly related to your perception of the world around you. Viewing things in a positive light can make your world into a better place, and foster confidence and self-respect.

4. As you meet the needs of your body, nourish your soul as well. Each of us requires relaxation, love, and acceptance. Spend at least five unrushed minutes each day in meditation or another relaxing activity.

5. Listen to your heart's counsel. The logical, profitable, or fastest course may be in opposition with what you truly believe would be most rewarding. Following your heart can lead to great wisdom.

6. Accept that you have no control over the actions of others and discover the freedom of forgiveness. Letting go of old emotional wounds carries benefits to both body and soul.

7. Understand that failure, while painful, can be beneficial. Learn from your mistakes. Give the people in your life the chance to experience and learn from their own.

8. Never stop learning. True wisdom comes from knowledge and knowledge will only increase if you keep your mind open to new ideas and suggestions.

9. That which is in your power to do is also within your pwer not to do. Self-discipline is the foundation for all virtures. Avoiding toxic substances and keeping your body and mind healthy will help you break bad habits and adopt positive ones in their place.

10. The means to growth and change are within you and cannot be delegated to another. Live your life as you wish it to be, cultivate self reliance, take responsibility, and love yourself.

I hope today, you find peace.

Tissue? I don't even know you!

I am sick of tissues. I guess I should say no pun intended? My wonderful children have decided to share their cold with me. Isn't that nice? So now I get to walk around the house with a tissue stuck up my nose sounding like a phone-sex operator. Don't you want to get with this?

So, tonight for dinner- since it is closing in on 5:00, will be Pesto Pasta. I got this recipe from the 30 minute girl but changed it only slightly so it's now Jeannie's 25 minute Pesto Pasta. Let's see, maybe if I start going over her recipes and changing one slight thing to make them all 25 minutes, then I'll put out a book. And get a TV show. Make that 2 TV shows. Or would it be 3? I'm getting a bit sidetracked imagining fame, money and many many followers. Okay, so back to the recipe.

* One package of Rotini Rigatoni pasta (I use whole wheat- healthier!)
(and after throwing a HUGE fit about how my husband didn't get the damn Rotini pasta I asked for, he annoyingly gently reminded me that he did get rotini pasta, and if I wanted the squared off ridged penne-type pasta- then I should have asked for Rigatoni. uhh- yeah. Oops. Good thing he's the Italian one...)

* Pre-packaged Pesto (make sure it has no hydrogenated oils- BAD BAD!) (You can make your own, but by buying the prepacked, I have now become famous for my 25 minute meals, so why do that?)

* Zucchini

* Green Beans

* Asparagus (which will later that night render comments from the Magnificent Emma of "Ewww! Asparagus Pee Pee!")

Okay, so- cut the zucchini, green beans and asparagus up to about the size of the rigatoni pasta.
Boil water, cook pasta- when there is about 5 minutes left, throw the veggies in so they become crisp-tender (I feel so professional with my crisp-tender)

Put pesto in a large pasta bowl. Put a ladle-full of pasta water to make pesto a bit more liquidy. Drain pasta/veggies and toss with pesto. Viola! Jeannie's 25 minute Pesto Pasta is complete!

Yep- just be careful of asparagus pee-pee. Apparently- it's kinda gross.

*picture coming soon- I have to wait for the computer savvy amazing Kevin to return from his business trip because apparently my computer hates me.*
*Oh- and in the long awaited picture of the Pesto Pasta? Yeah, you'll notice it's the damn rotini. *sigh*

It's a new dawn, it's a new day...

and I'm feeling good! Welcome to my very own blog.

So, yeah, now I will be writing my own blog. I feel so cool. I must confess, however, I have never been much of a writer. So why write a blog, you ask? Ummm.... Uhhh... well, because. I want to. That's why.

I'll tell a little bit about me. I went to college in Florida and received my degree in Early Childhood Education. Before graduating, I met my amazing future husband, Kevin. After graduating, I taught kindergarten for 2.5 years. In that 2.5 years, I married the amazing Kevin and became pregnant with our first child, a magnificent daughter, Emma. I was thus a full time stay at home mom and mostly loved it. When the magnificent Emma was 1, I became pregnant with our second child, a splendid son, Charlie. These children are now 5 and 3 and are sometimes more often than not usually the lights of our lives. And now here I am, a homeschooling mother of 2 kids. How did I get here (besides the obvious, please)?
It's amazing how fast time is going by. I hope by blogging (am I the only one that sounds really funny to?) I can hold on a little bit to what is flying by me.

Who knows. Maybe I'll learn something about myself. Maybe like I'm actually rich. And I live on a gorgeous island. With cabana boys. Bringing me lots of fruity rum drinks. Nah... what fun would that be?